


Oh shit, is this a closet?

by seekeronthepath



Series: Coming Out Stories [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Stiles Stilinski, Bisexuality, Canon Compliant, Coming Out, Gen, Light Angst, Questioning, Season/Series 01, Season/Series 02, Sexual Identity, Sexuality, figuring it out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-06-19
Packaged: 2018-04-04 21:55:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4154400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seekeronthepath/pseuds/seekeronthepath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A lot of things happened to Stiles Stilinski in sophomore year, what with the booming werewolf population, death threats, kidnappings, mystery monsters, and multiple serial killers. So figuring out he was bi just kind of...flew under the radar.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oh shit, is this a closet?

"I mean, could he _be_ more of a stereotype?" Stiles complains, stabbing at the controller. (It had been agreed upon by his Dad _and_ Scott that Stiles with a Wii was a bad idea. Since all Stiles' favourites were Xbox games anyway, his protests had been dramatic rather than sincere.) "Broody eyebrows, leather jacket, constant stubble, completely unfair muscles, and just... _ludicrously_ tight pants. I mean, that just can _not_ be comfortable."

Scott's giving him weird sideways glances. Stiles thinks back over what he'd just said.

"What? Dude, Derek's pants are like...apparently the world isn't right if everyone and their aunt isn't ogling his ass. And, I mean, it is just unfair that such an _asshole_ can be so _ridiculously_ hot."

"Uh...Stiles?" Scott says slowly.

"Yeah, dude?" Stiles replies absently.

"Since when did you think guys were hot?"

Stiles' brain kind of. stutters. Because...had he been doing that? He had been doing that. How long had he been doing that? "Shit. Uh...yeah, no, that...that pretty much caught me by surprise, because, uh, what?" No, seriously. What?

"Dude!"

On-screen, Stiles' character dies, but he honestly isn't paying attention anymore. "Am I, shit, am I gay now? No, that can't be right, I'm still in love with Lydia, I've been in love with Lydia since the _third grade_ , I'm just, uh...not straight. Maybe. Probably." Stiles thinks back over the last few years in the locker room. "Yeah, maybe very probably. Um."

Scott's eyes are wide. "So, uh...what now, man?"

Stiles shrugs helplessly. "I'm...gonna have to get back to you on that one."

\------

"Hey Stiles!" Danny calls, jogging a little to catch up to him. "Uh, about your cousin..."

Stiles blanks for a moment. "Who?" Oh, _shit_. "Uh, yeah, uh, Miguel, what about him?" Goddammit, why do these things always happen to _him_?

Danny raises his eyebrows. "Yeah, you should know, calling him your cousin was basically the worst lie I've ever heard. But, uh..." His face turns serious. "I just wanted to ask...are you, uh, safe? With him? Because he looked kind of scary, and he's older, and the fact that you're obviously hiding him..."

Shit. Crap. "Yeah, no, he's fine, it's cool, I'm all good."

Danny looks him over. "If you're sure. And, uh," He twists his mouth up. "Sorry I blew you off when you kept asking me if you were, uh, attractive to gay guys, and all. I just thought you were messing with me, I didn't realise you were serious."

"Uh..." Well, _this_ just went somewhere Stiles wasn't expecting. "Wait, you think...you think D-, uh, Miguel was in my room because...? Wait, you think a guy like _that_ would...? With me?"

Danny frowns. "To be honest, I was kind of surprised, but...I kind of couldn't think why else he would be there."

Stiles groans internally. Werewolves. Honestly. He was going to get himself  _so much_ _curly fries_ as a reward for dealing with this stuff. "Yeah, no, just...I owed him a favour and was helping him out. Nothing big." Although... "Actually, though, I kind of wouldn't mind an, uh, an answer to my question?" Since Danny appeared to be in a communicative mood.

"Really?" Danny asks.

Stiles winces a little. "Maybe? I'm kind of figuring it out right now, and I've got a lot going on, and it's all highly theoretical anyway, but...yeah?"

Danny looks him up and down appraisingly. "Well, you're not _my_ type, but...lose a few layers, maybe grow your hair out...you'd do alright."

"Really?" No, seriously? Because Stiles knows, ok, he knows that he's pale and skinny and flaily and just generally...weird. No one _ever_ looked twice at him - at least, not for his looks.

Danny shrugs and smiles encouragingly. "Sure. And, uh, don't worry too much about all this. You'll figure it out." He nods, and walks away.

Stiles watches him go, kind of bemused. Really, Danny was just...there was a good reason that _everyone_ liked Danny.

\-----

The whole Stiles-is-maybe-probably-definitely-not-a-zero-on-the-Kinsey-scale thing gets tabled for a while, because a) he nearly dies _way_ too many times; b) people are being murdered, and that's kind of important; and c) Allison Argent is actually as amazing as Scott thinks she is (which shouldn't be humanly _possible_ ) and gets Stiles a date with Lydia for the Winter Formal. So who cares about guys?

On the upside, the fact that he has absolutely no time to even bother _avoiding_ his Big Gay Freakout, let alone actually _having_ it, means that it just kind of...doesn't happen? He just kind of...starts letting himself notice who he's noticing. Which is to say, almost everyone he knows. Because he is the ugly ducking in a pond full of beautiful, deadly ducks, and...yeah, no, that analogy's not working out. But the point stands. His social circle (and it is _weird_ that he almost actually has a social _circle_ now, as opposed to just Scott) is so universally hot that none of them even look out of place next to _Lydia_. Except Stiles, of course. But, y'know, at least he's near her?

Unfortunately, whatever luck Stiles had, it runs out fast.

\-----

"Dude, everyone in here's a dude. I think we're in a gay club."

No shit, Sherlock. "Man, nothing gets past those keen werewolf senses, huh Scott?'

"Who's your friend?" asks one of the inexplicably friendly drag queens. (Not in a _weird_ way - just, y'know, like, why?)

"Uh, that's Scott." Stiles shrugs. "As you can see, he's kind of..."

A different one raises her eyebrow. "Not familiar with the scene?"

Stiles snorts. "I was going to go with oblivious and straight, but okay."

"And how about you, sweetie? You're not exactly dressed to get attention."

Unlike you, Stiles carefully doesn't say, because that would be rude. And honestly, it's not the worst drag he's ever seen. (Do _not_ ask.) He can kind of get it. "I'm, uh, not really looking for attention?"

"Yeah?" He should really learn their names. This seems kind of weird. "You straight like your friend?"

"Uh..." No-one's actually asked him that directly yet. "Yeah, kind of no?" Oh, man up Stilinski, you know you're not straight. "No, I'm not. But it's still, uh, kind of new?"

One of them smiles reassuringly at him. "That's okay honey, we've all been there."

Scott's headed to the bar. "I'd better go keep Scott company. But, uh, nice meeting you?"

They all agree, and one of them grabs a bit of paper and a pen from her purse. "If you ever want to chat, you feel free to come find us. I'm Stella, this is Tilly and Ginger. None of the local queens are going to push you, and you might want a friend around when you come here, okay? You're a little too adorable for this place."

Stiles raises his eyebrows. "Um...thanks?"

"Here. Feel free to call if you want advice on anything." And she (he?) gives him a _phone number_. God, this is weird.

"O...kay. Nice meeting you all." He waves half-heartedly as he manoeuvres his way over to the bar.

 

Sooner or later, of course, shit goes down.

And then Stiles is standing there, outside a gay club, at a crime scene, and his dad is looking at him suspiciously, and he figures, you know, two birds with one stone?

"It's a club, we were clubbing, you know? At the club." 

Yeah, Dad thinks (knows) he's bullshitting. "Not exactly your type of club."

And he's never gonna get a better set-up than that, so he goes for it. "Uh, well Dad...there's a conversation that we..."

"You're not gay."

What? Just. Dad just. ' _Not gay'?_ Because he's not, technically, gay, he's bisexual, but still, he actually _is_ , and he was thinking that this, at least, he wouldn't be lying about anymore. "I could be!"

"Not dressed like that."

And that's - that hurts. Because Stiles knew, okay, he knew about being judged by his appearance, oh boy did he know. People looked at him, and they dismissed him - all the goddamned time. But his Dad?

So. Well. This strategy isn't working, so, you know, Stiles can be flexible. He can lie instead of telling half-truths, he can point to the openly gay guy instead of coming out of the closet, and hey, apparently that makes him a 'good friend', so at least his Dad likes _something_ about him right now?

But it still sucks.

\-----

"Hey Stiles?" Scott asks, giving the queens nervous glances every few seconds.

"Yeah dude?"

"Uh...who are these people?"

And yeah, fair call. Because Scott had been busy, lately, with the Allison drama and the baby werewolf drama and the kanima drama, and so he maybe hadn't been around when Stiles had decided to go back to Jungle and talk to some people, and then go back _again_ and, well...he was kind of friends with drag queens now. "So, uh, you know that conversation we had a while back about me maybe not being straight?" Stiles runs a hand over his buzz cut nervously.

Scott nods slowly.

"Yeah. Well. Uh, not straight. Bisexual, technically. Possibly pan? At least bisexual." He waves half-hearted jazz hands. "Surprise?"

Scott scratches his head. "Okay. I mean, not a surprise? Because we did have that conversation? But yeah, okay." He nods decisively. "At some point, we're gonna have a video game night and like, actually talk about this. Once everything gets sorted out."

And Stiles...Stiles can get on board with that. "Assuming that everything ever _gets_ sorted out, but yeah. Anyway, I met the ladies at Jungle that first time we went, and they've been helping me figure things out. We cool?"

Scott smiles. "Yeah, man, we're cool."

\-----

The thing about being paralysed with kanima venom is it doesn't suppress involuntary stuff. Which is to say, at one point, during those horrible, horrifying, _long_  hours at the police station, Stiles might have been dwelling a _bit_ too much on the memory of being on top of Derek and kind of...pops a boner.

Derek is not amused. "Really? Now?" And of course he can tell.

"What? I'm bi, you're hot, I was lying on top of you half an hour ago, and I have the attention span of a gnat!" Oh shit, he just told Derek he was bi. Well, Morrell said to keep going. "Are you actually surprised that in between the mind-numbing fear I have occasional moments of arousal?" That was...maybe too honest.

Derek kind of. Doesn't answer. For a minute. And Stiles is freaking out a bit, okay, because he just _admitted_ to ogling a guy who, frankly, is a ridiculous 'manly' man and probably isn't, but still might be, homophobic, and almost definitely would rather not be ogled by Stiles in any case, and..."No," the guy says at last, which, by that time, means almost nothing, because Stiles forgot the question. "Disappointed, maybe. But not surprised."

So. Uh. Apparently Derek was cool with it? Or. Not uncool. Which was good! Because coming out was difficult enough without homophobic werewolves trying to kill you. Okay then.

\-----

By the time he gets home after the basement, Stiles is just...done. He's gone through so fucking much these last few months, and ninety-five percent of it has been total shit, and to top it all off, tonight pretty much proved he didn't even have Scott anymore. He had to fucking _walk home_ after being tortured in a fucking basement. He is fucking done.

And then he comes in and his dad was waiting for him, trying to find him, worried and scared, and he sees the bruises and he's angry on Stiles' behalf, and Stiles lies because even though he's sick of this shit, secrecy is a part of him now that he thinks he'll never lose, and his dad is _pissed_ and _defending him_ , and then Stiles tells him to calm down and he's _hugging_ him, and for that minute it's like none of the lies he's been telling ever happened because his dad is here and holding him tight, like he matters to somebody.

And Stiles thinks, well, he's tired of lying, and some secrets aren't his to share, but some of them are, and if he's going to lie about the bruises, he may as well lie _productively_ , and he says, "Seriously, don't worry about it. They were just homophobic assholes," and his dad pulls away and looks at him, really _looks_ at him, and Stiles just. waits.

"But...Lydia?"

Stiles, as usual, tries to cover nervousness with flippancy. "Bisexuality. It's a thing." And maybe a little of his bitterness leaks through when he adds, "No matter what I'm wearing." And maybe Stiles feels a little guilty at the look on his dad's face when he says it, but still.

"Stiles..." His dad sighs helplessly. "That night...it's not that that I thought you couldn't be gay because of what you were wearing. I thought you weren't gay because of Lydia. I _knew_ you weren't clubbing because of what you were wearing. Regardless of your sexuality, if you went to a club for _you_ , you'd at least drop the plaid."

And, well...fair call. Stiles had been lying, and he wasn't dressed for the club, and his dad had years of practice picking up on his bullshit. "So...you believe me?" His voice cracks a little, but after the night he'd had Stiles figures no-one could blame him.

"Oh, son." And his dad says it in that way that means 'I love you' and 'I know you' and 'I wish your mother was here'. "Of _course_."

"And...you don't mind?" Because Stiles _needs to know_ , okay? He needs to know that this one thing is going to work out, that even though everything he's done has gone to shit, who he is is okay.

"Stiles, I don't _car_ _e_." His dad holds him at arms length, looking at him. "Did you really think I would?"

Stiles shrugs, just a little. "I didn't _think_ so, but...I didn't want to disappoint you again."

"Oh, son." And then he's caught up in another hug, and it's even better than the last, and he collapses like his strings have been cut.

"I'm so damn _tired_ , Dad," he whispers, and his dad just hugs him and shushes him, and murmurs comfort in his ear like he used to when they were grieving, and it's the best thing he's felt in what seems like _years_.

"It's going to be okay, Stiles. I love you, straight, gay, or bisexual - it really doesn't matter. You were a hero at the game today, and if I find those kids that hurt you, they are going to be in serious trouble. Now you go on upstairs and rest. I'll see you in the morning."

And Stiles thinks: _Yeah. Rest sounds nice_. Because he's hurting, in more ways than one, and tired, in more ways than one, and you know what? Maybe it's his turn to wrap himself up in blankets and denial for a while and pretend that everything is fine.

So he does.

\-----

(About a month into summer he shows up at Jungle in clothes Lydia helped him pick out as a thank you/apology and Danny hits on him before he even realises it's Stiles. The queens are very proud.)

**Author's Note:**

> I like bisexual Stiles. I think it makes a lot of sense for him. And I wanted to write a story of him questioning his sexuality that was about self-discovery, not a specific relationship. Considering I'm ace and my self-discovery process was completely different, it was a challenge. Somewhat more challenging was fitting it into the show's timeline when I don't actually watch the show. Thank god for the Teen Wolf Wiki, or this would be hopelessly confused. I hope the characters and their stories ring true to you - I'd love to hear what you think.
> 
> Also, quick disclaimer: Stiles is new to the LGBTQIA community, so he doesn't always use preferred terms/concepts. Specifically, I've been asked to point out that his comment "Pan? At least bisexual" is a (somewhat biphobic) misapprehension of how bisexuality and pansexuality work.


End file.
